Hello Again

It is strange to think that I have not posted on the this blog for so long. I guess real life always seems to get in the way for me. With so much going on and me not always knowing how to deal with it, I seem to find myself always retreating into myself. I do hope that struggle will change in time. With all the chaos of the world, it seems at times to hard to tell. But for now, I would like to share a song that I started a long time ago, one that I wrote during a difficult time in my life; a time that still seems to continue on.

 

Falling Into Myself

Verse 1:

Falling down into myself,

Don’t know where the bottom is,

I reach my hands to catch my fall,

They only slip upon the walls

 

Bridge

Maybe one day I will run,

Fill my sorrows with the sun

 

Chorus

And I’ll run…(repeat 3x), hoping my sadness will finally end

Maybe I, can really fly,

And I won’t fall, fall, fall, into myself again,

No I won’t fall, fall, fall, into myself again

 

-Evanglina

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Calm

I apologize for not posting in so long. My life has seemed to spiral out of my control leaving me to wonder if it will ever be what I hope it to be. Still, with all the stress and worry, creativity can spark. I wrote this song using some remnants of my poem “Calm.”

 

 

Calm

Verse 1:

Calm…why am I so calm,

As disaster strikes all around me and I just stare

So, calm…what makes me so calm,

As my life just falters before me, piece by piece

Leaving me so empty,

A shell of who I once was…

 

Chorus:

But I’m so calm, but I’m so calm,

Why am I so calm, why am I so calm

 

 

Verse 2:

Calm…why am I so calm,

I feel the chaos circling around me as I sit still,

So, calm…what makes me so calm

Vicious glances and tension surrounds me as the war rages on…

Heightening all my senses,

Yet leaving me so numb…

 

Chorus

But I’m so calm, but I’m so calm

Why am I so calm, why am I so calm

 

Why am I so disconnected, why can’t I shed a single tear? When will I escape this prison of mine, when will I feel, why can’t I feel…

Left with only sadness,

The days I knew are long gone…

 

Chorus

But I’m so calm, but I’m so calm

Why am I so calm, why am I so calm

What makes me so calm, what makes me so calm,

But I’m so calm, why am I so calm…

 

-Evanglina

Remnents of Song

So I have once again divulged into some song writing, something I haven’t done in a while. Normally I write them for myself and keep them in a slightly messy song journal, but today I thought I might just share a bit of the song I am working on. It is called “Fantasy,” a song about wanting someone or something that is so far out of your reach that it seems ridiculous to even think about it.  Enjoy.

Fantasy

Verse 1:

I know I’ll never have you,

I know

I don’t know why I’d want to

I don’t

Yet here I am pining away.

For something, I know will never be

 

Now every time I see you,

I freeze

My knees beneath me crumble,

And my heart skips a beat

And I keep telling myself,

To let it go, cause I know…

Chorus:

It’s a fantasy of mine,

One I have to leave behind,

There’s no future to behold,

So I have to let it go, let go….

 

-Evanglina